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blissful slumber

   not so big smile  allow me to introduce myself. i am an ex-resident-alien-recent-citizen-of-united-states. as of august 10th, 2002, i would have been living in the states for a full dozen years. i was told that the reason we moved was to provide us a better education, drawing contestalthough i would have disagreed with that decision had i known what i know now. nevertheless, life in the u.s. has been fun and eventful. overcoming the initial culture shock was tough; i now know why my hello-kitty-knee-high-socks appeared so hysterical to my fellow 6th grade comrades. what made matters worse was that i knew only the first three letters of the alphabet, along with a few random words such as: yes, no, school, beach, pig, bus, and ball. a friend who spoke both mandarin and english told me to answer 'yes' to the question "do you speak english?" which confused many teachers and bus drivers why i wouldn't respond to anything else past that initial inquiry. at any rate, i adapted.

     over the years i grew up like all others--survived middle school and puberty, stood up to peer pressure, had my heart broken, mended my broken heart, went to prom, got dumped, dumped someone, made lifelong friends, went to college, did my share of partying, crammed before finals, pulled all-nighters, skipped classes, fell in love, graduate -- and then it was all over. suddenly i was free from academia with no plans and no directions. so i did the only thing that made sense -- to move out of florida.      

      to the berkshires i went, where seasons are distinguishable and mountains galore. i moved in with my 'ambiguously involved man' aaron, sharing a two bedroom house on five acres of wooded land. i worked as a customer service representative at berkshire bank, even acquired my first business card. i lost a dear cat mookie and a dependable car. i gained a dear cat goober and a dependable car. life in the mountains was peaceful and serene; our friends referred to the house as "the little piece of heaven on hanky mull hill."  my full time job left me little time to do what i enjoyed. so i scrounged for free moments here and there to update my piece of web space, perhaps to remind myself that i can still compose complete sentences, and to keep in touch with current technology, in order to keep myself sane.

big smileit didn'tfirst graduation take long for me to realize that i needed more challenge than what the bank was able to offer. i made plans to apply for various colleges for a graduate program, and thus my quest for continuing education began in the summer of 2002. over the next few months i crammed for the GRE while i searched for the perfect school, but nothing caught my attention -- until i was introduced to emerson college in boston. from the first day i read about their media arts program, i was determined to get into this school. So i took the test, prepared my credentials, spent months writing my personal statement, and elicited help from various friends who were willing to proofread endlessly. the application was completed in mid janurary, 2003. we moved in temporarily with aaron's family in RI the end of february while i kept my fingers crossed on the prospect of returning to school. on april fools day, i received a letter from emerson, welcoming me into the media arts program. It was no joke -- i had been accepted. once again, i have a plan to do something meaningful with my life.

mid april, 2003. we are moving to belmont MA tomorrow. from there, the commute to school will be simple. boston, full of art and music, will be right around the corner. our new roommates, a few members of the russell st gang, will bring wonderful energy to the apartment we found. i will have to get used to public transportation, and goober will have to learn to behave around hunka the cockatiel. it's the year of the ram, my birth sign, my lucky year. my future is bright.

     So why do i obsess over my own baby pictures? perhaps i miss the carefree smile i wore as a child. perhaps i miss the confidence i felt when i participated in the drawing contests. perhaps i want to be able to sleep knowing i have no responsibilities. maybe i miss my face the way it was. whatever the reason, they're here, and they look much nicer than most other pictures i have. So allow me to endulge myself. look around, send me comments, constructive criticisms, insults, praises, or whatever else your bandwidth supports. i'm all ears.

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*pictures by sue-phia hsu